A short post today to wish everyone a Happy New Year, and to share a couple of songs that I have found really inspiring this year (particularly as I was thinking about my own future), a New Year’s gift to you all.
Name 10 Things
The first is Name 10 Things by Paul Baribeau (where I need to credit my cousin, Music from Blue Skies for the introduction):
The music won’t be to everyone’s taste, so here are the lyrics:
Name ten things you wanna do before you die and then go do them.
Name ten places you really wanna be before you die and then go to them.
Name ten books you wanna read before you die and then go read them.
Name ten songs you wanna hear again before you die, get all of your friends together and scream them.Because right now all you have is time time time yeah,
but someday that time will run out.
That’s the only thing you can be absolutely certain about.Think of all the things that are wrong with your life and then fix them.
Think of all the things that you love about your life, be thankful you are blessed with them.
Think of all the things that hold you back and realize that you don’t need them.
Think of all the mistakes you have made in your life, make sure that you never repeat them.Because right now all you have is time time time yeah,
but someday that time will run out.
That’s the only thing you can be absolutely certain about.Name ten thousand reasons why you never wanna die, go and tell someone who might’ve forgotten.
Try to list the endless reasons why it’s good to be alive, and then just smile for a while about them.Soon the sun will rise and another day will come.
Soon enough the sun will set, another day will be goneand right now all you have is time time time yeah,
but someday that time will run out.
That’s the only thing you can be absolutely certain about.
I’ve mentioned it previously, but my Dad’s death, age 55, from a sudden and shocking heart attack, really hammered this idea home to me (before I’d ever come across the song). Luckily it was certainly how he lived his own life – he was the most content person I’ve ever known in real life, and took every opportunity he could to seize the moment and wring joy and fun from it.
Whatever you believe about what comes after death, we only have a limited time on earth as we are, and we have no idea how long that time will be. And we do have choices about the way in which we spend it, even though sometimes it might not feel like it.
We all have choices about how we live – every year, every day, every hour, every minute. Tiny choices (sugar in my tea today?); huge choices (is this relationship the right one for me?); choices which loom large at the time (what GCSEs should I do?); and choices we don’t even realize we’re making (but this is the way I always walk to work…).
I 2013 I urge you to start making choices actively rather than passively about the life you are living.
Make a small choice – smile at someone in the street (especially fun in the UK as people seem to find it very unnerving…) or make a list of things you love doing (spending time with your family, cooking, watching Buffy, reading, walking, listening to the rain and so on) and then go and do one of these activities. And another. And another.
Choose your life.
Living in the Moment
For my trip itself, my anthem is a song by Jason Mraz, called Living in the Moment.
If this life is one act
Why do we lay all these traps
We put them right in our path
When we just wanna be freeI will not waste my days
Making up all kinds of ways
To worry about some things
That will not happen to meSo I just let go of what I know I don’t know
And I know I’ll only do this by
Living in the moment
Living our life
Easy and breezy
With peace in my mind
With peace in my heart
Peace in my soul
Wherever I’m going, I’m already home
Living in the momentI’m letting myself off the hook for things I’ve done
I let my past go past
And now I’m having more fun
I’m letting go of the thoughts
That do not make me strong
And I believe this way can be the same for everyoneAnd if I fall asleep
I know you’ll be the one who’ll always remind me
To live in the moment
To live my life
Easy and breezy
With peace in my mind
I got peace in my heart
Got peace in my soul
Wherever I’m going, I’m already homeI can’t walk through life facing backwards
I have tried
I tried more than once to just make sure
And I was denied the future I’d been searching for
But I spun around and searched no more
By living in the moment
Living my life
Easy and breezy
With peace in my mind
I got peace in my heart
Got peace in my soul
Wherever I’m going, I’m already homeI’m living in the moment
I’m living my life
Just taking it easy
With peace in my mind
I got peace in my heart
I got peace in my soul
Oh, wherever I’m going, I’m already home
I’m living in the moment
I’m living my life
Oh, easy and breezy
With peace in my mind
I got peace in my heart
I got peace in my soul
Oh, wherever I’m going, I’m already home
I’m living in the moment
(If you weren’t aware, I love Jason Mraz, and his all his little hats, and very much enjoyed working my way through a number of YouTube videos to pick the one I’ve chosen above! Interestingly, he’s very popular here, I’ve heard his latest album all over Chiang Mai. OK, I’ll stop with the gushing now 🙂 )
The song captures for me the essence of Mindfulness, that is the practice of having an awareness of the reality of the present moment, rather than constantly looking behind us or in front of us.
We can be mindful even when we’re making choices about the future, or we’re reflecting on and learning from the past, by paying active attention to those thoughts. And these are important activities, no question. But if we spend all our time in the past (if only we were still together; I wish I’d chosen the pasta rather than the pizza) or in the future (I’m never going to get that job; what if they’ve sold out of that red dress I wanted to buy), then we stop enjoying the moment we’re in, and we can create a lot of stress and strife for ourselves – ‘catastrophising’ about things that don’t exist, or thinking back to what we could have, or should have done in a particular situation.
Mindfulness is about being fully present in the moment, for example, whilst we’re watching New Year’s fireworks, paying attention to the noises and beautiful colours rather than thinking back about what a terrible year it’s been or thinking forward to what you’re going to have for breakfast in the morning. Or whilst on a walk, immersing ourselves in the sounds and smells of the natural world rather than spending the walk remembering a bad choice or worrying about a future choice.
By all means, reflect on last year, and consider what you want next year to look like. But be wary of letting the past have an undue influence on your present (humans are terrible about judging the world objectively), or your worries about the future colour the moment in which you are living.
When you spend time with friends and family over the holidays, be fully present with them. Pay attention. Our time is a gift and if we’ve made a choice to spend it with someone, then they and we deserve that gift to be whole-hearted.
(If you’re interested in Mindfulness meditation, I can recommend Mindfulness: a practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world) – there’s lots of good psychological and other scientific research out there which suggests it’s really beneficial).
An Alternative View
As a final New Year’s gift, to ensure I don’t come across as hideously sanctimonious (!), here’s an alternative and amusing philosophical insight into living in the moment by David Mitchell:
Sawatdee Pi Mai / Happy New Year!
El D says
Happy New Year to you, too, El! Hope it turns out to be all you want from it. And, having read the above, I’m sure it will. We’ll be raising a glass to you tonight. A El x
ellenmbard says
Thanks A El! I raised a glass in return – though it was a coconut smoothie!
xx
Cat says
Happy New Year, El! Looks like it’s 4 something a.m. in Thailand, so I hope you have had a good one!
Cat xxx
ellenmbard says
Thanks Cat, yes, I was definitely asleep by then, as the amazing and beautiful rush of fireworks and sky lanterns had finished pretty much by then. Hope you had a lovely NYE and Christmas was good, and you have ensured you had some you time too.
xx
JohnD says
Happy New Year to you, Ellen. It’s 5 degrees here and I envy you the heat. See you in the class when you get back.
JohnD x
ellenmbard says
Thanks John! Happy New Year to you too.
I missed the class in December, and haven’t found a Krav teacher here yet sadly. Andy suggested a little Muay Thai but I don’t think I’m quite there yet!
See you when I’m back in the spring, and try and all stay in one piece until I get back!
Ellen x
Howard says
Happy New Year mate! That David Mitchell thing is the one!!! Lots of love from all of us over here!
samanthatomkinson says
I have some down time in NZ now I am back North so wanted to catch up on your posts Ellen. I love this one. Absolutely love the concept of Mindfulness and Jason Mraz 🙂 I have downloaded the book so will let you know how I get on…..